Dating Someone Else When Your Partner Has Dementia…Is It Wrong?

Gail Lansbury gives her husband Bruce Lansbury a kiss during one of her four weekly visits to Caleo Bay Alzheimer's Care Center in La Quinta where Bruce now lives. Photo taken on Tuesday, February 2, 2016.

Dementia can last many years and for a considerable amount of those years the person with dementia often is not the same person they were previously. Does this situation change things for couples?

I am really interested to hear your thoughts on this topic and see what the general opinion is on the matter. I have seen first hand how the ‘couple dynamic’ changes when someone goes into a nursing home.

There are many different angles to discuss this topic from and am hoping we can have a mature and sensitive discussion about the costs and benefits of dating another person.

This very situation would be occurring all the time around Australia, hence I feel this is a really important topic that needs to be discussed and ‘Dementia Downunder’ is an ideal safe and respectable forum to do so/

Some discussion points are:

• What if the person with dementia gives a green light to go ahead?

• Should the person who is dating feel guilty if the person with dementia forgets everything about their partner?

• What are the benefits of seeking new friendships and relationships?

• Should we judge those that are lonely and seeking love and affection?

• When the person declines so much that they are a different person, is it now ok to look outside the relationship for companionship or intimacy?

*Please read the two articles below to gain insight and a balanced viewpoint on this topic and then feel free to comment below with any feedback or thoughts you may have.

http://www.nextavenue.org/should-you-have-affair-when-your…/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/contemplating-divorce/201011/dating-someone-while-married-spouse-alzheimer-s-disease/

 

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